Rank: Newbie
Joined: 7/27/2010
Posts: 1
Points: 3
Location: London
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Hello,
I am new. I am Emma Rose, mummy to Haron, who is 2years 2months.
He has recently had a diagnosis of atypical autism. I was told that I should not 'read too much' in to the diagnosis, and that it was more for clerical purposes, because he has developmental delays very similar to autism, but needs the 'label' in order to access the early autism intervention program they have in my local PCT. Fair enough.
But I am finding it very frustrating not being able to communicate with him. He is billingual, which doesn't help because he is bound to have delayed speech, and his dad was a late talker. He is, by all accounts, a *very* bright boy, and there is a part of me that feels he may be holding back on his speech on purpose, as a way of getting what he wants. For instance, if he doesn't understand what I am asking of him, I cannot discipline him for not cooperating. BUT occasionally he slips up and I realise he *does* understand what I'm saying. But with his failure to speak, how do I know what he does and doesn't understand?
He is very sociable, on his terms. He has a 'girlfriend' - a special friend at the childminder's, who he spends lots of time with and gives kisses to. He has also started to join in with all the activities at the childminder.
He can say and sing words by heart, but appears not to understand their meaning.
I am just posting this because I a finding it very stressful at the moment, being unable to communicate. And waiting to hear about a follow up for the speech therapy, plus all the refferals the peadiatrician has given us. I've been told I am unlikely to hear much until September, as they are busy preparing kids to start school etc. But to be honest, I want to scream. I just want to have some sort of conversation, verbal or non-verbal, with my boy.
He communicates by manipulating my hand if he absolutely can't do something (will exhaust all options of doing it himself first) - but if I speak to him I never get anything back.
Apart from kisses when I ask :-)
Sorry that was so long - thanks for reading guys.
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Rank: Advanced Member
Joined: 1/22/2008
Posts: 557
Points: 1,671
Location: Colorado
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Hello Emma Rose,
I think you "win" for having the prettiest name of anyone on the forum!
I have never heard of "atypical autism." That is interesting. Your son is still young, so keep yourself open to all possibilities!
I am interested in what you wrote: "but if I speak to him I never get anything back." I want you to listen very carefully to how you word things to Haron and report back! Write down verbatim what you say.
Here's my supposition. Most parents ask LOTS of questions in the hope of hearing an answer. Questions often do not elicit good responses from children. Watch out even for statements that have rising inflection which turns a statement into a question. I suggest that parents make as many straightforward comments and statements as possible. Look for prior posts I have made about what I call the Upside-Down Pyramid. You can search on this site. When parents say something in an appealing way, children will often join in and imitate or comment because there is no implied "pressure" to do so.
Ask me some questions, and I will write some more. I will be away from the forum until Saturday this week.
Mary Lou B. Johnson, M.S.,CCC-SLP
http://www.helpyourchildspeak.com
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